David’s Daily Digital Dollop: Dollop 141 – A Dollop With a difference (For Fans Of Paranoid Neurotic Rants)

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Doing these Dollops has really brought out the neurotic and paranoid part of me. Yesterday’s Dollop garnered an interesting reaction from Clair, who I believe has listened to all 140 Dollops so far. All of her comments have been very positive, but her comment on yesterday’s Dollop simply said, “different!”

It didn’t strike me as a particularly positive response when I first read it. But of course, how much can really be read into one fairly neutral word and an exclamation mark? Different could mean anything: refreshingly different, surprisingly different, disappointingly different (which in some ways could be seen as a compliment; I mean, one failure in 139 successes is surely a good thing, right?) Plus what is the exclamation mark meant to convey? Surely the use of the exclamation mark denotes that the person is wanting to exclaim the word. But all it really does in this instance is adds further complication, because I have no idea what is being exclaimed: anger? Shock? disgust?

I assume though, given that all Clair’s other comments have been positive, that her “different!” is suggesting that she didn’t enjoy yesterday’s Dollop. But I don’t think it’s really that different a Dollop. I’d argue that there have been Dollops this week that have warranted the “different” tag more than yesterday’s . Surely, walking down the street at 3 in the afternoon saying “good morning” to people is more different? Or Friday’s Dollop in which I went on a walk and spent all the time getting distracted by things that were happening in the street, and utterly failing to address the actual subject I was meant to be talking about; surely that was more different?

Doing this project has been a really interesting experience for me. There have been so many days when I’ve dreaded and despaired about having to sit at the computer than think of something to write. There have been lots of times when I’ve just started writing anything out of sheer desperation, and then been astounded and really enthused by where my brain is leading me. Yesterday, the subject of revenge porn came from one little joke. I certainly hadn’t planned to write about it beforehand, it simply came out of the writing process, and ended up being the main subject of the Dollop. But this is often what happens when writing these Dollops, and so I certainly didn’t view yesterday’s offering as being at odds or divergent from the subjects covered in previous dollops. I’ve written about having sex with ninety-year-old women, killing cats, Boris Johnson, Jeremy Corbyn, Nigel Farage an? David cameron, trips to the supermarket, and my kettle. If you’re new to these Dollops, all of that wasn’t in just one crazily weird post. So I don’t really think yesterday was so outlandishly different.

OK, enough of this prevarication, I’ll be honest, I’ve been rumbled, the game’s up. I knew someone would spot it. I fancied a day off yesterday, so I took on the services of a ghost writer. This time though, it was a living ghost writer rather than the dead, literal ghost writing poltergeist from Dollop 34, (remember that Clair? We’ve had so many happy memories over the last few months haven’t we? Where did it all go wrong Clair?) Anyway, lesson learnt. I have sacked the ghost writer, and I am back, hence the notable improvement in quality and clearly demonstrative return to form, which I’m sure you’ve noticed Clair. I should have known better than to think that I could pull the wool over your eyes.

There have been so many times when I’ve released one of these Dollops and worried that what I’ve written is utter rubbish or devoid of any comedy. But then this negativity is instantly obliterated by someone’s positive comment. But this is what this project is all about. It’s about forcing myself to create something everyday, despite my mood, my energy levels, how busy I am, or how inspired I am feeling. It’s a bit of an exercise of attrition, and not just for me, but also for you, especially if you, like Clair, have managed to listen to them all. As I half-jokingly intimated in the very first Dollop, I know that I have the kind of obsessive personality that will mean I will persist with this project, even if everyone stops reading and listening. So far, I’m pleased that there are still hundreds of you out there, although we’ll see whether this egocentric rant changes that. Plus, I am aware that we’re not even halfway through this project yet.

Anyway, apologies Clair for making you the centre of today’s Dollop. I hope you’ll keep listening, and hopefully you’ll survive until the 366th Dollop. I’m not usually this neurotic and paranoid, honestly. No really I’m not, no, I’m not, shut up, I said I’m not!

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3 thoughts on “David’s Daily Digital Dollop: Dollop 141 – A Dollop With a difference (For Fans Of Paranoid Neurotic Rants)

    • Are you attempting to be the subject of today’s Dollop? I have spent all of today so far in deep meditation, so I’m all calm and blissed out now. Today I think I’ll write about pretty birds, flowers, and the joy of a smile on a child”s face.

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